DAY TWO – TRANSFORMATION SERIES 2019
The seemingly insignificant changes in your life, that over time, change the whole direction and end destination of it.
“It is never too late to become what you might have been.” – GEORGE ELIOT
We all reach certain points in our lives, a crossroads where our lives reach a certain threshold of pain that we are no longer willing to settle for. This threshold is very different for every person.
If you are unhappy with anything in your life and recognise it, then see this moment as a massive call to action; a unique opportunity to respond to that desire from deep within the “real” you that wants to experience so much more of life.
This can be very challenging because as we have this urge to improve our lives but don’t have an effective strategy to achieve it. So we enter the familiar territory and take the next logical step and work on the effects instead of the cause.
We stop eating and exercise like crazy because we want to lose weight, rather than understand why we are overweight in the first place, we then convince ourselves that this will help and make us happier hoping that our willpower will carry us through … rather than figuring out why we want to lose it … and using that as the catalyst for longlasting change.
Here is a simple thought process that helps to focus my mind whenever I feel like my wheels are spinning.
For my life to get better I have to get better.
For things to change I have to change.
I am mine. This is my life and I am the creator of my destiny.
We can change any and everything in our lives by changing ourselves.
This puts you in the driving seat of your life and makes your life your responsibility.
It eliminates fear and apprehension because we know that no matter what life gives us we can always get to the next level and take the next step by simply making the internal shift in our own mindset.
We can stop looking for events, people and circumstances to blame. We only need to look inside. No matter how influential we are we cannot control the circumstances and events of our lives.
There are only three things that we have absolute and total control over and together they allow us to experience life. Our thoughts, our actions and our words are always under our conscious control.
They are MY thoughts, they are MY actions and they are MY words AND they create MY world every minute of every day.
This is incredibly liberating. Whenever I want more, to experience more or change anything, I need only look inwards and work on myself.
The hardest work you will ever do is the work you do on yourself. – Jim Rohn
See, how we can run around and work incredibly hard at trying to influence and change circumstances, but that will only leave us feeling exhausted and reluctant to try again. It ís much easier to change yourself and your perception of yourself and your life remembering that nothing has any meaning except for the meaning you give it.
Changing external events have very little impact on your life in the long-term. Small changes in you; in your perceptions and mindset might seem insignificant at first, but because the change is in you it effects all of your thoughts, all of your actions and all of your words.
This seemingly insignificant change, over time, will change the whole direction and end destination of your life giving us a perfect opportunity to rewrite the blueprint of our lives.
If the captain of a ship changes direction just one degree the end destination might be a different continent altogether, it may be unnoticeable over a short period of time, but over greater distances, the small change becomes very significant.
How often do we see people trying to change the big things; they constantly try changing any and everything in their lives, but then fail to maintain the change. Instead, focus on making small consistent changes in yourself, in your own character you can create some incredible lasting results.
All change starts and ends with you.
If you are going to invest the time and effort in improving your life, then invest it in changing yourself. Invest your time and effort in improving “you” and let go of the superficial urges to control events and circumstances.
Your whole perception and experience of life comes from within you and who you are.
Change yourself, change your outlook and watch the world improve and change before your very eyes.
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DAY ONE – TRANSFORMATION SERIES 2019
As we head into the new year, this is a great way to begin. Ever wondered what it takes to be in a continual state of motion, a state of growth and development in all areas of our lives? Well, carry on reading … it is as simple as a state of mind?
Change your mind and the rest will follow…
All change starts with a change of mind. You have to start by changing your thoughts about want you want to change.
Constantly trying to change behaviour will rarely create long-term and lasting change.
In changing the way you think about something you immediately change your perception and consequently the way you feel about it.
“Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything”
– GEORGE BERNARD SHAW
Change has a negative connotation for lots of people. On a deep emotional level, we are creatures of comfort and automatically seek out the things that feel good at the moment. We long for comfort and this usually comes from the things we know; those things that are familiar to us.
Once we can comfortably deal with and “know” all the “unknowns” we can “relax”, because our nervous system and our mind is designed to find and attach a meaning(s) to everything and therefore something new is always a confrontation between that which is and that which will be in your mind.
The unknown is always something that our mind and our nervous system have to “unravel” afresh and this process feels uncomfortable on many levels. When something becomes comfortable you get used to it as you remove all the “unknowns” and your automatic behaviour can take over again. Our nervous system works primarily by conditioning and by repetition we notice and assume patterns that are consistent. This system is really there to serve us in helping us be more efficient and to be able to do more and more, more efficiently.
Your mind is designed to always look for the best way. Through repetition, we learn certain orders and sequences in which things happen and we learn to recognise and respond according to these sequences. Every emotion you experience, for instance, is nothing but the result of a sequence of events and reactions triggered by your unconscious awareness that generates and creates the actual feeling which is nothing but a sensation in your nervous system.
To change anything you must, first of all, become aware of these patterns. You must become aware of what goes on under the surface of your conscious awareness. This is not difficult and everybody can do this. You don’t need to understand everything about the human nervous system to use it. Simply be aware of the fact that there is a part of you that responds and acts “automatically” based on your past experiences and associations.
The challenge is to go from one pattern, one that does not serve you, to one which does. You quite literally have to change your mind in that you have to change the way you perceive yourself and your life. Doing things differently will feel uncomfortable at first, but you can rest assured that the “uncomfortable” will become “comfortable” as you start to form new associations and new patterns of association.
The process of making the “uncomfortable” comfortable or making the “unknown” known is the way we grow as human beings. What you are comfortable with represents your comfort zone which includes all the experiences that you can comfortably deal with. If you don’t expand this “zone” then you simply won’t expand yourself as a person.
The need to grow and become more as a person is a deep emotional need that all humans have. Without growth, you simply won’t be happy. All growth, although it feels uncomfortable in the moment always feels immensely fulfilling in the long-term and it is this feeling that we all crave; the feeling that we call “good”. You can do something that feels comfortable and “good” at the moment by staying with what you know, but true fulfilment comes from pushing beyond your comfort zone and creating a sense of pride in yourself. Growth means change and change involves risk and risk is the process of stepping from the known to the unknown.
The truth is that all of life is constantly in a process of change. Nothing ever stays the same. It is the nature of all of life, including you. Even if you do nothing life will still change.
For you to progress, you have to decide to consciously initiate and create the change. You have to consciously put yourself in the uncomfortable place where you can grow and as you do this you progress. Progress is by choice while change is automatic. To be in control of your life you have to consciously choose to change and to keep changing yourself to become the person you want to be.
All change starts with a change of mind. You have to start by changing your thoughts about want you want to change. In changing the way you think about something you immediately change your perception and consequently the way you feel about it. When you change the way you feel you change your behaviour and that is how you progress.
Constantly trying to change behaviour will rarely create long-term and lasting change.
Change your mind and the rest will follow!
If you don’t change then you simply won’t grow and if you don’t grow you are not really living…
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4 Lessons I Learned In 2018
I love the play on words …
It seemed appropriate given that I learn as I live, let me explain.
Rather than using hindsight to review my actions and results it seemed to me that this year has called for a much more proactive approach from me, its been as though I’ve needed to have one eye focused on the rear view mirror as I’ve pushed ahead with my vision for my business and how I see my life unfolding.
Being the overachiever I am, this time of the year usually does two things for me. It gives me time to reflect on the successes and lessons of the year and provides an opportunity to refocus my energy into planning the next one.
There were so many lessons this year, it is difficult to choose just 4, so I’ve picked out 4 that have helped to shape the way I live, how I spend my time, how I treat the lessons and blessings life brings, appreciating those close to me and safeguarding my health because at the end of the day that’s why I look after myself.
Lesson #1: Time Doing Things You Love Make The Other Stuff Worth It
The biggest events of the year for me have catapulted my business forwards and at times left me spinning my wheels. I have had moments of pure joy and delight and also total overwhelm and what I call analysis paralysis. With that said I am really excited about what the next year holds. I feel like the last two years of graft have helped to set me up for this coming year. The investment I’ve made in working with coaches both financially and in time, the resources invested in business development and creating systems to underpin it all plus the hours and hours of creating content and serving my amazing clients have resulted in solid foundations that will move me forwards.
It’s not surprising therefore that it feels like this year has gone in a flash.
So where did it all begin?
The closure of my studio in March and the shift of my attention from 121 personal training to running my Ultimate Body Formula Coaching Program, meant a shift in the way I delivered coaching to my clients. I’ve developed an incredible formula that helps women uplevel their importance on their priority list with some incredible results.
Talking about incredible results …
I wanted to share a video I created about Marilise’s journey with me over the last year, she has done so incredibly well and seen real transformation in many areas of her life. I am super proud of her, as you can probably tell.
CLICK HERE TO WATCH
Lesson #2: Celebrate The Blessings & The Lessons
In an effort to find more time, I decided to give up teaching Body Pump after 10 years of delivering the program, that was a big step for me but one that was necessary to free up my energy and focus so I could do what I needed to do.
My mission is to help as many ambitious women as I can, put themselves first, to feel and look fantastic and to understand how to maintain their health because it is so simple and everyone deserves to feel confident and beautiful in their skin.
I’ve realised that people come into our lives for two reasons, that is as a blessing or a lesson. I believe that either we succeed or we learn, failure isn’t an option. All we do is pick up and try again right?
I think about these things as the flip side of the same coin … and try to take the positive from each situation rather than focus on the negative or take things personally …
I’ve had clients this year who have done exceptionally well and others who have fallen off the radar and for whatever reason have become totally unresponsive, people subscribe to my newsletter and others unsubscribe, people, appear in my life and others disappear from it for no rhyme or reason. In balance, we all take what we need from those around us to progress and I’ve come to accept that that is life. More often than not we have no idea who we inspire, so for every person that leaves, it creates an opportunity to engage with someone new, for every door that shuts another opens .. that is the beauty of life in continual motion.
Like a coin being flipped in the air … we have no idea of the outcome … whether it will land on heads or tails? All we can control is how we react and respond. Both sides call for celebration. We learn we grow, we evolve we love.
Lesson #3: Health Is Everything
About 8 years ago I had a motorbike accident, I took all the impact of the collision on the left side of my body. I landed on my side and slid across the road, my Yamaha Virago between my knees … luckily I got up and walked away from the accident, however, a crushing injury on my left knee and hip meant that when I went back to teaching I had to be mindful of an imbalance developing in my body. While I thought I had fixed it ‘managing’ really came to the fore. I had been heading to my favourite chiropractor every 6 weeks to be manipulated into place, I then went back to teaching, exercising and doing what I do, until I needed to be manipulated again. A continual cycle of pain management and function. This is so so true of the human condition .. we learn how to cope. This was by no means optimal for my performance or my health but I managed it or so I thought.
When I stopped teaching Body Pump, a lot of the repetitive nature of my classes disappeared and as a consequence, the weight training I was doing in the gym started to demand more of my body and the old injury’s started to show, I was in agony and very quickly realised that I had to go back to basics with my training and address the imbalance properly and focus on getting stronger before I got back to competing.
So I made the decision not to compete in September and to focus on getting stronger. A decision that was tough and left me feeling frustrated and low about the whole thing, but as I say Health is Everything! and I am now fighting fit and ready to focus on next season.
Lesson #4: Life Is A Tapestry We Weave
My husband celebrated his 50th birthday this year … yes I know he looks 25! This is a big event in anyone’s life and this birthday was no exception. We live in the UK our family lives in South Africa so a family celebration was almost impossible for us, plus he decided he didn’t want a party or a big fuss, just to go away and get some sun. OK?
When I was growing up my family made a big deal of birthdays, we celebrated them, in fact, any opportunity to celebrate anything we did. So this was a bit of a weird request, so I thought ok, he wants to go away, let’s do that and then and I’ll arrange a surprise party on our return. Wags’nTales in Surbiton did a fab job to accommodate us, with delicious food and cake in his favourite flavours! Friends arrived before we got there, no one spilt the beans, he had absolutely no idea. So yes it was a big surprise! It put a smile on his face for days after that. Feeling loved by those closest to you is an absolute gift. Something that lifts the spirit and helps you fly.
Life is a tapestry we weave, you only get out what you put in. In the high moments, we forget about the lows and in the lows its the memories of the highs that pull us out. Its special moments where we connect with each other that brings the magic to our relationships. Being present and engaged is one of the biggest challenges we all face as busy people with a million things going on at once, if we can remember this and act on it there will be lots of beautiful colours woven into the tapestry of our lives, precious time shared and memories made.
Part of my promise to Rod this year is to give him 50 cakes .. one for every year. So far I think I’ve done at least 10 .. we’ve got some way to go – lol
So there you go my 4 Biggest Lessons of the year.
To find out more about how you can get some incredible results this year, simply download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet. Reach out to me and let’s see how we can work together.
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How many of us start thinking new years resolutions come this time of the year … if not resolutions we set intentions for the year ahead. They usually begin with internal questioning, maybe feelings of melancholy at the end of yet another busy year, maybe feeling a bit low and depressed about a lack of action over the past 12 months, the months just flew by and didn’t quite go as planned … well, friends, that’s life!
Ever said that this is MY year! I’m going to …
- look after myself this year
- spend more time with my friends and family
- have more fun
- earn more money
- lose that stone that’s been hanging around for too many years …
And then found success in all of the above?
Very few … in fact around 5% of us actually do what we have intended to do.
Imagine my joy when I came across this amazing idea …
This is perfect !!
If like me you are soooo over the thought of new years resolutions, that never really come to fruition because we forget about them or set unrealistic expectations or don’t take the process seriously, you’ll love this idea.
Word-of-the-Year has become a game-changer for many. Christine Kane is the CEO and founder of a coaching company called Uplevel You. She says that she wasn’t the first to do it or come up with it. But may have been one of the first to share it.
“I don’t know. I just know it works – not just for me, but for many others like me.” read more here
So I figured if it works for all these amazing people .. it’ll work for me ..
In essence, we choose a word that resonates with us and we make it our word of the year … here’s the thing.
Choosing a word isn’t magic. Results won’t just happen because we pick a word and then sit back waiting for things to happen … quite the opposite. The word to choose is the word that brings energy to our situation and then allow it to guide us as we engage with it, think about it and take action based on it.
We choose the word … one word … but how?
This is how Christine does it …
Just one word. That’s all.
Then, hold that word in your mind throughout the year, and let your word guide you to take action. For instance, let’s say you want to make a resolution to lose 20 pounds, and to change jobs. Rather than say, “I resolve to lose 20 pounds and get a better job,” (which can be somewhat overwhelming) you might sit with this thought for a little while. Write in your journal.
Maybe then you would recognize that you’ve been scared to look for another job because there might not be something out there, and maybe you’ve been overeating to stuff down the fears that come up and the feelings of insecurity.
So, instead of making resolutions – which do little to inspire you – you choose the word “courage.” Courage then becomes what guides you. Each day you focus on that word. When you don’t want to go to the gym, you don’t berate yourself with the threat of your resolution. Instead, you motivate yourself with your word. “Courage.”
You say it aloud to remind yourself. And you go because learning how to not be scared of change is exciting to you. The word then builds on itself. You might decide to take a yoga class even though the skinny yoga girls have always scared you. You might find that you have a little more energy with each new thing you try.
Maybe this energy motivates you to call an old friend in your field and let her know you are looking for another job. Courage becomes the guiding force, not the harsh standard. (And WAY better for you than a pound of bacon and four eggs for breakfast, too!)
So here goes … the idea is to choose a word that resonates with you.
Here is a list of a list of possible words, see if one stands out for you. Just choose one.
Love, Clarity, Freedom, Compassion, Gratefulness, Change, Creativity, Generosity, Courage, Appreciation, Power, Certainty, Growth, Development, Abundance, Longevity, Kindness, Focus, Presence, Health, Wealth, Knowledge, Acceptance, Forgiveness, Hope, Happiness, Fun, Resourceful, Peace, Wisdom, Patience, Trusting, Release, Revive, Grace, Humour, Adventure, Friendship, Laughter, Awareness, Gentleness, Healing, Action, Persuasion, Discipline, Open-Minded, Accepting, Joyful, Exploring, Discovery, Unwrapping, Beauty, Respect, Self-Awareness, Openness, Visionary.
Have you got one?
Then hold it in your mind …
And head on over to the discovery tool that Christine has designed it’s awesome & really useful !! I have downloaded the PDF for you so click the image, or go here.
Let me know what your word of the year is … and HAPPY NEW YEAR !!
I’ll check back and see how you are getting on in a few months.
My word of the year is: THRIVE – because its what I need to do to contribute to the world in a meaningful way. There is a post in this so keep your eyes peeled. (The other two words I was considering were, Happiness and Execute. Both of these will help me thrive and likewise, when I thrive I’m happy because I’ve executed. So chicken and egg for me but I feel the best word for me today is THRIVE)
So where to from here … ??
ACTION STEP #1: SHARE YOUR WORD, with someone, on social media and explain why.
ACTION STEP #2: GET ENCOURAGEMENT, find an accountability buddy, share your word and why and then hold each other accountable.
ACTION STEP #3: POST YOUR WORD, somewhere you’ll see every day. This is your guiding word for the year, see it, believe it, do it.
Good luck !!
Download your copy of my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet, let’s see if I can help you get into the best shape of your life this year …
I can't fit into my poxy dress !!
Ok so about that ...
It's simple we buy another dress, that's the easy part, not so easy to face the fact that we've let things go a little... and get honest about the fact that something has to change, especially if we aren't happy about this. More often than not the first sign we have that we packed on some weight, lost our waist, needed a bigger size is when we reach for a party dress from last year or try slipping into a favourite pair of jeans.
So what to do about this ... embarrassing midsection?
Sit-ups! and a diet ... will have to work fast the party is next week ...
LOL, we've all been there I'm sure, but the truth is that these things won't change how you look and feel on their own and neither will starving yourself, it is tempting just to try anyway isn't it?
Ladies, here are the top 2 things you can do today to start to have an impact on that embarrassing midsection that affects many of us ambitious women out there right now, especially relevant to those who are about to attend a big event, like a friends BIG birthday party or a wedding in a few months or maybe in just a few weeks (eek!) - here’s how you can start to do something to take care of that today…
Just as the ladies have done in my Ultimate Body Formula program,
1 – Accept that you have to take time for you
if you don’t, you’re last on the list and you end up running out of energy and say – I’ll do it tomorrow – right? So it's important to protect time for you so right now open up your diary and create a non-negotiable time slot for you. Set that on repeat every day at the same time.
2 – Now you’ve got that time protected you’re going to use it to do one of the following things:
- Make up your food for tomorrow so you start to make it much easier and more convenient to eat healthier foods, especially as you are in control of what you've created - make it taste good and you will actually look forward to eating it.
- Then take a 20-minute brisk walk followed by 20 squats and 10 pushups – done!
Come back here tomorrow and comment on this post to celebrate that you are one of the small % of ladies who will actually do this alone without support and I will be giving you a massive well done!
We all struggle to find enough time to do everything, allow our own health and fitness to feature last on our list of priorities, thinking we don't have time ...
This is a mistake, a false economy and a price I've discovered not worth paying.
Download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet below and discover what the ladies on my Ultimate Body Formula program are doing to ensure they fit into their little black dresses.
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