Sleepwalking through  life?

Sleepwalking through life?

My dad always told me about how quickly life goes by the older we get, I never really understood that statement as a child. At this stage of my life, I have no doubt in my mind that it does! My weeks fly by as I'm sure do yours, the question I ask myself at the end of each one is where did that week go? Where did that month go ... what happened in that year ...

Many of you know I have worked with coaches over the last few years for my business and also for my competitions, I have invested a lot of money in my own personal development and training and still feel like there is so much to learn and do with my life, that is flying by at a rate of knots ...

Yikes! So how do we stop time and do what we want to do and LIVE our dreams?

I was listening to a chat the other day about this woman who lost a massive amount of weight just drinking meal replacement shakes. She then started eating proper food and put it back on and proceeded to yo-yo diet for specific events throughout the year. She realised after her second bout of flu that this was no way to live and enjoy her life.

So like so many of us she started eating normally on the weekends so she could have a glass of wine and chocolate pudding, a pizza with the kids and then starving herself in the week, thinking she just needed to cut out food and let her body deal, only eating when she was hangry ... well day 1 went well - lol - been there?

OK then she discovers the latest fad, everyone is eating low fat ... yes, that must be the answer ... nope, that didn't work!  OK, maybe high fat? Maybe paleo, maybe low gluten, maybe no carbs ... argg you can see where this leads. Its no wonder we all end up so confused about what to eat and when and how much and then we set ourselves up to fail because we are unhappy and craving food and feeling low because we are missing out and then because we have left ourselves in a malnourished state we get depressed and sick ...

Yes? I know these feelings well!

Before you know it another year has passed and you've still not hit that elusive target weight that you had in your mind. How much I should weigh, what size clothing I should be wearing, how thin my legs should be ...

Are you this person?

This is what I call sleepwalking through life ... not actually living it or enjoying it fully ... we choose to live it in snippets, a night out with friends, a holiday away with the family, a night in to watch TV, eating too much of the wrong stuff, overdoing it and then feeling guilty drinking 5 litres of water and detox tea and then starving yourself to get back on track ...

OK! I'm calling this today!

Just STOP!

Stop the negative self-talk and let go!

LET GO the preconceived idea of what you should look like, what you should weigh and what size clothing you should wear!

Instead, FOCUS on the things that bring you JOY.

From today ...

Start living the life you want to live as though you are that person who is in shape, healthy and happy. Make the food choices that person would make. Make the effort to exercise the way that person would exercise and LIVE!  There is no point waiting until you are size [blah] to go and buy that gorgeous dress you saw, go buy it and wear it with pride. Get enough sleep, drink enough water and enjoy the moments that make you happy. Look after your health and before you know it, everything will come into balance and you will shift more excess in this state than you ever would drinking meal replacements and starving yourself.

Remember your energy flows where your focus goes ... focus on the things that bring you joy!

Is it time for YOU?

I love working with female business owners to help them bring all their drive for business, to focus on themselves, to find the formula that works so that its a no brainer to live your life to the full. Healthy, fit and well so you can cope with anything that life throws your way!

The magic starts with a desire to change and a willingness to trust the process ...

To find out more about the Ultimate Body Formula Program, head on over to my website www.colettepienaar.com and download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet, where I share 3 things you can do today to move forward and start taking steps to do what's needed with confidence.

If you would like to tell me more about you and book in a no obligation call, then fill in my form.

The formula I have developed has evolved over the last 13 years and I use my very best tried and tested methods to help each person. There is no one size fits all program. Get in touch, let's see if I can help you too.

To find out more about the program, head on over to my website and download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet.
or fill out my form and tell me more about where you are at.
Fill out my online form.

Do you feel invisible?

Do you feel invisible?

There are a few moments in life that stick in our minds, this is one of those for me.

I can remember having a conversation with one of my clients who was heading towards a big birthday, she explained that she felt like she was becoming invisible ... puzzled by this statement I was curious to know why. This beautiful woman with a huge personality and a generous heart was standing right there in front of me ... definitely not invisible ... so I asked her to explain.

She said that throughout her life she had always managed to connect with people, she felt like she was taken seriously at work, her relationship was great, she just coped with life well, and she smiled when she said she turned heads. This gave her a big confidence boost and made her feel beautiful and like her life was good.

Her business grew from strength to strength, she always had enough energy to keep focused, she felt good about herself, managed to fit into her clothes and was happy with the image she was portraying being congruent with who she was at the time, generally happy with the direction her life was going, the blueprint she had in her mind of how life should be was looking the way she had imagined.

Then out of nowhere ...

Something in her started changing ...

She looked at this woman in the mirror and just didn't recognise her anymore ...

Her heart sank ...

OMG, she thought, where has that girl gone?

The one with all that confidence and total zest for life. She realised that she had put everyone and everything ahead of her own needs and had let herself go. While her business was flying, her figure, her health, her confidence were all dwindling.

She had finally realised that she had to start living again.

With too many close friends getting sick, she began to really appreciate that life was too short and that there were a few changes that needed to be made so she could find herself again.

She knew it was time to let go of the old and start writing a new chapter.

She just had no idea where to start ... which is when she reached out to me and asked for my help.

We had worked together in the past so she knew I could help her with her nutrition and exercise, what she realised over time was that those things are just a small part of what she really needed, she also knew my business had grown and evolved, she had seen the amazing results from my current clients and wanted those for herself!

Colette, can you take me to the next level?

My response was I'd love to!

So she filled in my form and we got chatting about the vision she had for the next chapter of her life.

What an exciting time to reinvent yourself I said, your business is good, life at home is good all we need now is to do what is necessary to bring YOU into focus. You've given it all to building an incredible lifestyle which is something to be proud of, it's your time now! Time to get yourself back, creating the space for you to do what you need to have loads of energy throughout the day, to have the figure you want, the confidence in your appearance again and knock their socks off!

Let's turn some heads again, shall we?! and get you to the place where you are living that ideal life you have dreamt about ...

Is it time for YOU?

I love working with female business owners to help them bring all their drive for business, to focus on themselves, the magic starts with a desire to change and a willingness to trust the process ... the knock on is transformation - very exciting to see.

To find out more about the Ultimate Body Formula Program, head on over to my website www.colettepienaar.com and download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet, where I share 3 things you can do today to move forward and start taking steps to do what's needed with confidence.

If you would like to tell me more about you and book in a no obligation call, then fill in my form.

The formula I have developed has evolved over the last 13 years and I use my very best tried and tested methods to help each person. There is no one size fits all program. Get in touch, let's see if I can help you too.

To find out more about the program, head on over to my website and download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet.
or fill out my form and tell me more about where you are at.
Fill out my online form.
Not kind to myself at all!

Not kind to myself at all!

I had just finished teaching my 16th class for the week and was feeling knackered, my body and my mind were exhausted. I felt like I needed to hide away somewhere and recharge, to withdraw into my shell like a good little crab. The only problem is that I still had another class to teach and 3 clients to see that day alone, forget about the rest of the week ... 20+ classes, 15 clients ... it's no wonder I had no time!

So I knew I had to get a quick coffee down the hatch and a protein bar in while I set up my next class and boom! had to be back on it - this is what worked for me. On the outside, I was on form, a true fitness professional, on the inside I was burning out!

Interacting with clients and motivating, encouraging them to do more to have fun ... developing that connection we work so hard to build ... this is one of the skills we learn as instructors, connection with the people in front of us, helping them to progress no matter where they are at.

While rewarding to see individuals progressing at the end of a week of giving of ourselves its all too common that we have nothing left.

I would get home after teaching my final triple on a Sunday and not want to talk to anyone, see anyone or move. I would inadvertently have a shower, put on my trackies and slippers and crash in front of the TV. Not a good look or a fun way to connect with my hubby and friends. I just had nothing left. A totally empty cup which as we all know and experience from time to time is not good. When I took time out to recharge it was usually when I had burned out or on holiday. And each time I did this I realised how utterly exhausted I really was. As soon as I found myself going through the motions and dramatically lacking energy I knew it was time to take a breather.

Then, of course, the holiday snaps come out and while I knew I had a well-deserved break I was never happy with what I saw reflected back at me.

Never feeling proud of my figure, always wanting more for my life, feeling like I was failing with my own health and fitness and knowing that I had to take control and take care of me. I had a moment of stark realisation one afternoon when I was walking my dogs, it was late in the day and the woods were deserted. Not sure why my mind took me to this place, but I realised that if anything were to happen to me, firstly my dogs weren't the best guard dogs, fail on that score, and if I needed to run, I simply didn't have the strength left in my legs, I was too tired and fatigued to even try.

It was the moment I realised that I was capable of being kind to everyone else, generous, patient, full of positivity and yet so incredibly incapable of being kind to me!

Suddenly the shell that I wanted to hide away in, just didn't feel big enough! and I realised I was investing my time and energy in all the wrong places.

It was time to slow down, give myself the space I needed to take care of me and be KIND!

This is one of the fundamental lessons we learn on the Ultimate Body Formula Program, something the ladies that work through the program with me learn to put into practice.

To find out more about the program, head on over to my website and download my Woman In Motion Cheat Sheet.

or fill out my form and tell me more about where you are at.

Fill out my online form.
I thought I’d be happy if I lost weight…

I thought I’d be happy if I lost weight…

So there it was, that pair of jeans I bought 6 months ago. They are a size 10, super stretchy, skinny and fitted, I'm pretty sure they will fit. Looking back now I remember how that felt, how my first thought was that I bet I won't even get my thighs into them let alone do them up. I had been wearing a size 14 for years, I felt comfy in them but they were no longer staying up. When I started to lose weight and to see myself looking trimmer and my clothes were feeling roomy (finally ... felt like it had taken ages but that's a story for another day) I popped into Zara and picked up a pair of jeans to motivate myself to stick to the plan. Choosing a size 12 would have been sensible but hey, you know me ... never half-hearted or half-assed ... which was my concern lol. If I got them over my thighs ... would I get them over my glutes ... and then do them up. eek ... what if they don't fit ... what if I hate the way they look ... what if ...

OK - enough with the self-doubt and negative self-talk missy ...  just put them on ...

So with a deep breath, that's what I did.

I genuinely thought that my whole life would be different if I just lost weight, I would feel better about myself, and yes that's true, I did. I would fit into my clothes, yes I'd started wearing a smaller size. I would be happy with my new figure, yes, I was happy enough although still had a way to go and being the typical overachiever I am, I felt like I needed a new challenge. A new level to reach and that didn't necessarily mean a smaller size.

So yes I'd lost weight ... goal achieved ...  what now?

Was I finally happy?

Was my life completely different?

What I didn't realise is that losing weight was just the beginning of my journey.

The start of a new adventure and something that would keep me motivated and focused on the road ahead.

So from my initial weight loss achievement, I decided to push the boundaries and compete, I became a bikini athlete and after working with a coach got onto the stage in a stupidly small bikini. I had no idea what I was doing, I was way out of my comfort zone, not only in the bikini but wearing heels, full makeup and showing off my new figure, lining up with seasoned athletes I was a fish out of the water. So I'm sure you can understand my amazement when I placed in two different competitions for two consecutive years, great fun and an incredible achievement, earning my FMC Pro Card, this year I'll be back on stage, whoop!

The point of my story today is simply this, we set goals, we work our asses off to achieve them and when we get close we seem to take our foot off the gas and accept our progress so far as 'being enough' ... feeling 'happy enough' with the result ...

Why do we settle?

Is it because we fear failure? Do we accept that 'mediocre' is good enough?

Yes, I've done better than I thought I would do, that's enough for me ... feeling lucky just to have made it so far. Do we just feel like we need a big glass of wine and a mental break?

Is accepting where we are about self-sabotage? Is it because we never really believed we could actually achieve that goal. Why is it that we are able to be focused and disciplined in the week and as soon as we see progress, we reward ourselves with a night out and end up back at square one come Monday morning.

I was thinking about this the other day and my initial reaction was its because we fear failure, when in fact I think it's likely that we fear success ...

This is because we don't know what life looks like once we've achieved our goal and for that reason, we settle, moving from outside our comfort zone to inside it. That is human nature.

I'll be happy if I lose weight.

Simply not even considering the unintended consequences of it.

Questions like this spring to mind ... what happens if I don't like how I feel? how will it affect my relationships? will my partner still find me sexy? will I still find my partner sexy? what are the things I will need to put into action once I've achieved my goal ...

What are those unintended consequences?

This dialogue is important to have as we see changes happen. Being honest and open-minded about where the road we are on is likely to take us is important to consider. This is something that I have tried and tested over the years and forms an important step we map out when we work together, the ladies on my Ultimate Body Formula Program do this at various stages throughout the program. We like to think of body transformation as a journey, not a line we cross ...

 

Find out more about the Ultimate Body Formula Program, download the Woman in Motion Cheat sheet HERE.

 

Gliding like a swan

Gliding like a swan

I came across this photo of our resident swan, don't know about you but I love watching them as they glide across the water, they are so incredibly majestic and beautiful to watch. Everything about them whispers serenity ... calm ... take time and I am reminded to stop and take in the view when I see them, I can't help but feel incredibly lucky to have these amazing creatures right here on our doorstep.

At the same time, this photo reminds me of how hard they work to make their glide look effortless, calm peaceful on top while their feet and legs work underneath. This a little like us right? Wearing a mask of calm while we live and function in organised chaos.

The biggest lesson for me is to take a breath and live in the moment, even if it is just for that moment.

This is no dress rehearsal, its life ... we are alive and living today, tomorrow a mystery and yesterday history ...

So be kind to yourself today and take the time to care for you.

Yes, that means slowing down and taking a moment to breathe, everything can wait for 10 minutes ...

To care and to be cared for is one of our basic human drivers, something we all need to do to feel valued and happy and satisfied with our lives. As women that need to nurture usually comes naturally and today that care starts here ... with you.

So consider this ... when was the last time you bought yourself some flowers or took a coffee break at a nice cafe with just you and a fabulous view, or refreshed your lingerie drawer ... for no one else but you?

If you haven't done anything like that for a little while, then grab your diary and choose a day this week, to take yourself out to buy flowers, lingerie and a nice coffee ... yes diarise the time now and don't cancel.

#youarewelcome #selflovefirst

 

The relationship we have with ourselves is one of the most meaningful relationships we can have, we know ourselves inside and out ... come from a place of kindness and compassion and just be ...

Find out how the ladies on the Ultimate Body Formula Program learn to be kinder to themselves every day and how this 'state of being' helps them achieve their goals.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT MORE

 

Slow Down … Be Kind … and say ‘I Am Enough’!

Slow Down … Be Kind … and say ‘I Am Enough’!

Being kind to others comes as second nature to most of us right?

We easily encourage another person, compliment them, smile at them, let them know that they are doing a great job .... that they are loved and supported.

Why is it so much harder for us to be kind to ourselves?

After having a tough day we often listen to our inner critic to review what's gone wrong ... you should have ... why did you say that? ... didn't you realise that ... we feel anxious, berated and like we've failed, certainly not the way we treat others we care about.

Now consider how you would have treated a friend in this scenario. Differently? For most of us, the answer is yes. We would listen, empathise, encourage and make that person feel like we are on their side, in their corner and if asked we help them come up with a plan to move forward ... isn't this what friends do?

There is enough negativity in the world so my challenge every day is to change it! and that starts with the way I treat and think about myself and the way I talk to myself. Negative self-talk is so, well negative! I'm realising how important it is to love and treat myself the way I treat those I love and care about. In fact, being in a healthy relationship with myself is proving very important for my overall well-being. It is teaching me that kindness, love is the foundation for healing and personal growth. It provides emotional strength and resilience, allowing me to make mistakes, forgive myself, embrace my imperfections and motivate myself with kindness.

So if you are recognising negative self-talk in your behaviour, do not worry my friend, because you can learn and practise being kinder to you ...

 

Here are a few ideas you can put into practice today ...

Diarise time for you ...

Take some time to unplug from your phone, computer, social media, meetings and demands made on you by everyone in your world. Your system needs time to reboot and refocus. So allow yourself some time, could be 3 10 minute breaks where you make a cup of tea and drink it while you take in a view of a lovely painting, your garden, a bunch of flowers, listen to music, do some yoga, or guided meditation ... something other than work-related stuff that demands your energy and attention in every other waking moment.  Do something that calms your mind and brings you joy.

Listen & acknowledge how you are feeling ... then accept & appreciate yourself

Rather than deny how you are feeling, be honest and acknowledge where you are at, maybe feeling satisfied with life and totally chilled, maybe frustrated and stressed ... being kind to yourself means allowing yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling at that moment. Instead of judging your emotions or trying to numb them, you give yourself permission to experience them, without judging yourself. This goes hand in hand with self-acceptance which means that you stop trying to change yourself into something you’re not and at the same time be open to discovering the real person you are. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses, we all make silly mistakes and we all fail from time to time.

None of us is perfect ...

(except for my dad - he always sings this Mac Davis Song to me when I see him - Oh lord it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way, can't wait to look in the mirror because I get better looking each day ... love him - lol)

By accepting yourself just the way you are, you make space for new experiences, new hopes and dreams, and you make room to become who you really are.
Take care of your body first ...

This is a little like the safety announcement on an aeroplane when we are told to put the oxygen mask on ourselves first before helping anyone else ... getting good nourishing food in, enough sleep and being active daily without compromise is the best way to be kind to yourself before anyone else ... the reason is simple, without you functioning at 100% you can't help others effectively. We think we can and we try our best but this is one thing that will come back and bite you. This is one thing we need to do ... it is about raising the level of necessity and prioritising yourself.

Give thanks for your achievements, no matter how small ...

It is much easier to tell someone else how amazing they are and congratulate them on their achievements than it is to do just that to ourselves. It feels conceited and like we shouldn't need to do so, because well, they are our achievements ... the value in doing this for ourselves is in the insight and awareness it brings for continual forward motion, growth and development. So the next time you achieve something small, stop and acknowledge it and say something to yourself like ... good effort! or well done, or awesome job is done!

Make friends with your biggest critic ...

You know that judgmental voice we adopt when we berate ourselves for our actions, it sounds like a continual stream of criticism - negative self-talk - tends to push us into a state where we will do anything to silence it, we push it away, we ignore it, we end up punishing ourselves and bury our heads in the sand, when all we really need to do is listen from a distance, in a non-judgemental way and acknowledge that the voice is simply trying to protect us, to ensure we are prepared should we be faced with a repeat performance. So rather than feeling fearful, open ears and eyes, listen and see with curiosity. When you hear that self-talk and it begins to drag you down with negative thoughts, try to engage with that voice and begin a dialogue. What is driving this? What is it trying to tell you? Then be compassionate with yourself and accept your feelings. As soon as you realise that your critical voice is ultimately trying to help you and when you try to understand its underlying fears and needs, it will lose its power. Because in the end, the most effective way to approach yourself is from a place of kindness and compassion.

Tell yourself “I am enough” every day !!

Choose to believe you are enough ... put a positive perspective on just like you would a pair of glasses. These glasses bring in to focus the good stuff. Then tell yourself that you are enough at regular intervals throughout the day. Try this, on waking to say: I am enough! 3 times and boldly. Then 1/2 way through your day, ask yourself Am I enough? and check in with your mindset, follow this up with a bold I am enough statement. Then before you go to bed say - I have lived today to the full because I am enough! (even if you know there is room for improvement) Be consistent with this practise and give it a go for 7 days. Set an alarm on your phone that buzzes at specific intervals in your day to remind you to do this ...

 

The relationship we have with ourselves is one of the most meaningful relationships we can have, we know ourselves inside and out ...

Choose to come from a place of kindness and compassion and just be ...

Find out how the ladies on the Ultimate Body Formula Program learn to be kinder to themselves every day and how this state of being helps them achieve their goals.